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From the Cat’s Point of View
You’ll recall reading about how Boydog inveigled his way into the home and hearts of my friend’s family? Well some of their other four-legged friends weren’t entirely chuffed with the new arrival. So, in their quest for world dominance, this week’s Dog Squad Blog is told by cats, or should I say, specifically, Meg the cat tells it like it is.
‘What the heck is that doing here?’ said Chloe to Toni.
‘I haven’t the foggiest, but I’m not hanging around to find out,’ replied Kim.
Let me explain. I’m Meg, the self-appointed head cat, and you, dear reader may be surmising that those comments were made by the cat loving teenage daughters.
But you’d be wrong. Chloe, Toni and Kim are the three cats who in their early days made my life a misery. I appreciate they are extremely odd names for cats, but I believe the teenage cat-loving daughters were huge fans of something called “24” and named their new fur babies after some of the characters. Unfortunately, there were some mishaps and a couple went on secret missions never to return, or crossed roads without looking both ways. Fortunately, I was born before “24” came along and was therefore given an entirely more sensible and suitable name.
Now that’s clear, I shall continue.
It was in all of our best interests to get rid of this new intruder. We became very aware that ‘it’ had something called a limp. This seemed to be the reason it was allowed to enter our kingdom uninvited. It didn’t appear to be that bothered by my clowder, or any other felines for that matter. Furthermore, we were overjoyed by the fact that it was tied up outside at night, while we snuggled up in the warm bedroom. It was very obvious that cats’ rule and dogs drool for this family.
There were unfortunate nights when our slumber was well and truly disturbed by horrendous barking and yelping. This stupid dog was scared of hedgehogs! These little balls of prickles would scurry through the garden looking for a drink, unaware that this ginger mutt was in their way. There were only so many times that the man of the house was going to be roused from dreamland at an ungodly hour to shoo away the hedgehogs and pacify the mutt.
At this point I must apologise for the lack of photographs of Boydog running away from hedgehogs at 3 o’clock in the morning. I have no idea why the husband didn’t take any. But here’s one of Toni with Boydog.
As the nights got cooler and our family stupider, the mutt found his way into their hearts and our bedroom. A double bed can comfortably accommodate two humans and four cats, but introduce this ugly ginger mutt and the equation gets complicated. Legs cramp, bottoms get cold and heads get slept on. This was the beginning of the end for us feline friends.
We were introduced to our new bedroom (formerly referred to as the utility room), incorporating our own front door (normally referred to as a cat-flap). If they want to see a proper cat-flap, just give it time! (Get it?)
So, our fate was sealed, and we had to come to terms with the fact that we were now a family with a Boydog. I’m sure you’ve read the books and seen the films and know how dogs hate cats and cats hate dogs. You know they fight, chase each other, cause pandemonium etc etc. We were poised and ready for action, action which would get this Boydog into so much trouble. We waited and we waited but nothing. This odd, ginger creature just ignored us! We baited him and encouraged him to chase us but still nothing. He didn’t even bark at us. Did he perhaps think we were hedgehogs and that hedgehogs were cats? And to make matters worse, he wouldn’t even go to the toilet near the house! We had no ammunition at all.
It seemed that Boydog was here to stay and there was nothing any of us could do about it.